Wally naps.

Gigi sighs.

Bingo reminisces about the '80s.

Beauregard on the Cilantro Plant

Bingo on Patio

I'm about ready to blow this joint, Texas that is. Governor Perry is about about to be crowned emperor emeritus. All he's done is wallowed in George W's footsteps, even copying his relaxed nonchalance confidence. A politician is first and foremost a leader. George W. was what the country needed. Somebody shot us a low blow, and Bush just took it in stride with a firm determination to overcome. With that smirk he weathered the storms. Sure he had some blunders, remember "Mission Accomplished" and that video of him looking for WMD's behind the curtain in his office was definitely in poor taste. In fact I couldn't stand W. while he was in office. I never voted for him and I didn't pay much attention till 9/11. Then he attacked Iraq with Cheney calling it brilliant. I thought he was a religious nut trying to bring on Armageddon. But now I'm a litter older and I can understand things like threats and that you gotta do what you gotta do. I mean it's not a perfect world at all.

So here's a piece I wrote a few years ago. Now it seems a bit nostalgic. Kinda like when after 9/11 a friend said "Don't we all just miss Clinton"

George Bush's next speech:

Four score and a little more years ago our country was at war. Later we had another war. Those wars were called one and two. Now we've had some skirmishes since then, just little dinky things. The military calls them operations, because sometimes the world is sick and the US is the doctor. But the two world wars were big and bad. Now our eminent scientists have studied this and come up with some startling conclusions. Now I could give you some ho ha mumbo jumbo, but I'll explain it like this. Has anyone ever seen the matrix? [Wait for nods] Ok. So you know bad things happen in threes. That means we have a third world war coming up. [Look stern] And we've got to do something about it.
I am an American. My family is American. In America we believe in certain principles. Freedom for all. The right to pursue happiness. And above all democracy. That means everyone has a say. Now until now I've enjoyed my unbridled authority and demagogic policy [Smile] but my fellow Americans are important. I want y'all to know that we Bushes believe in democracy. I'll give you an example of one of our family's problems:
We all remember a former president who didn't like his broccoli. "Nope" he would say "I just don't like that vegetable" Yes I'm talking about former president George Bush. Well you would think that none of us Bush boys would like broccoli. But there's one who loves his vegetables. My brother Governor Jeb Bush. Remember that brain dead lady Terri Schiavo? They wanted to let her die. They pulled out her tubes [Make yanking motion] and were going to let her pass on. My brother put his foot down despite my fathers stance and said "Put those tubes back in her, were going to pump her full of nutrients until she's as plump and green as any vegetable" [Pound podium]... I on the other hand like to stay clear of the whole vegetable situation. [Chuckle]
In America we are winners. And once you're at the top, there is no where to go but down. So we must again make everyone love America. We must open our borders to all immigrants. We must allow no trade alliances. Free trade for all. We must increase foreign spending. Not on military operations but on providing medicare to everyone in the world. We must accept communist China's ideologies and I will personally invite Cuban dictator Fidel Castro to vacation with me on my ranch in Crawford, Texas. This is not going to be easy and that usually means one thing: were gonna have to spend some money. That means taxes. But wait wait wait. [Hold up hands] I still am holding to my campaign promises. In fact some people will even pay less taxes. In fact if you have more than a million dollars you probably won't even pay taxes at all, I think it's that way already but I'll check and make sure.
History has shown us that we can live from the sweat of the proletariat. Hell most of them don't even got TV's to watch this speech on. We will set up tax free centers walled off from them where we can live peacefully and happily while they pay for it. I know this doesn't sound fair and America likes fair. My advisers explained it to me like this. Proletariat is almost like pro lariat. That makes you think of pro rodeo. Now pro rodeo may be fun to watch. But you sure don't want your daughter to date someone who rides a bull. I may be from Texas but I know what cow dung smells like. Anyway I'm scared of cows, you ever looked at them, creepy. [shiver]
Once we have our walled tax free centers [WTFC] there will still be an evil facing our great nation. It won't be any foe from across the sea. It will be an enemy within. An enemy that wants to destroy all that is good and just. An enemy that will eat our babies. An enemy that is in this room right now. [Glare at the senate minority leader] My advisers tell me that the word Democrats comes from Demo meaning demon and Crats meaning Hitler-like people. They struggle against everything that I do for you people whom I love. We will defeat them and when I sign HB1394 we will be rid of them. They will be sent to a deserted island. And we will watch them on TV while they answer questions and compete in challenges for water.
Well, in America we are always looking up and our future is now looking clearer. One of my campaign promises was to protect the third amendment. So I set up the Center for the Protection of the Third Amendment. Little did I know that no military still quarters soldiers in peoples home. It's impracticable. So to justify their, shall I say mighty budget, I have given them the status of renaming things. So the CPTA is now the CPTAART (Center for Protection of the Third Amendment and Renaming Things). Due to their suggestions the following changes are announced. The moon will now be called the Gerald R. Ford Orbital Sphere, the sky will be know as the Eisenhower Zone and hello will be replaced with 'George Bush is Awesome'. Please start uses these phrases for the good of our country. And as incentive to use them we will be introducing a negative tax that is retroactive.
So to you my beloved Americans I say good night and to the rest of the word I say "George Bush is Awesome".

It's a hot day on the fence line.

super happy fun time sport slide

Williethekidd diggin a hole

Is Bipartisanship Possible


The media is full of false prophets of agitation, trying to rally support to one side or the other. If I watch those shows and listen to politicians my throat gets tight and I can feel my blood get up. The feeling is just an impotent rage, directed inward, and it only harms me. I have to turn it off and remember the sun is still going to rise and fall, winter will be cold and summer hot. But that seems to be what politics is about, picking sides. I must admit though I'm biased. Even though I think that I am right of center, I still would prefer to vote for a Democrat. My reason though is pretty cynical: I just think Democrats are a tad bit less hypocritical than Republicans.

Republicans say that they are for small government and pro business. It seems to me that they're for big government and big business. Democrats say they're the party of the people, but they seem to be for big government and complaining about Republicans. I don't pretend to be an informed voter. I don't watch the news on TV nor do I read the newspaper much. So my impressions of the two candidates for Texas governor are pretty simple: Rick Perry, used to be a Democrat, now he's Republican. He's a waffler. Bill White use to be mayor of Houston. I got an email from his campaign that repeatedly stated that "Texans want a new governor". That just smacks of close-minded political campaign jibber-jabber.

I want to know who's best for Texas because I would like to think that I'm for what's right instead of just thinking that I'm right. So before the election I will research what the issues are, research each side's position and decide who I'm for. I'm a conservative Democrat but I'll give Perry a chance to make me cross the aisle and I'll give White a chance to get me to vote. And if I start to feel my blood pressure rise, I'll step back, bow my head, and remind myself what is important in my life. But if those candidates start preaching, and they say that we're living in non-God affirming Sodom and flag burning Gomorrah, well it's not going to do them much good running for city council.

George Bush: Superhero

I don't know if anyone has realized this but last year former President George W. Bush performed some feats of superhero caliber. When he heard about the domestic terrorist attacks at Fort Hood he immediately got into his BatCopter and flew down to Killeen. There he disabled and paralyzed the Islamo-Psychiatrist Terrorist. He grabbed the fallen soldiers and though it was in a hospital with plenty of stretchers he carried each to a hospital room over his shoulder, after checking with triage first of course. Then he proceeded to give the appropriate medical response, and after all had been stabilized he comforted those who were still conscious with his wit and good humor.

I respect George W. Bush and I think he is a good person. I am a humorist and sometimes I deal with serious issues in the only way I can: by hyperbole, by jest, or even just by rambling musings. But I just have to wonder if on his way home after acting like a true hero, former President Bush wondered if his decision to invade Iraq might have had some sort of causal relationship with the tragedy in Central Texas. This isn't a Republican vs. Democrat thing, because it is our nation's policy, not one half or the other. Do we need our foreign policy to be carried out with a big stick, because in this world we have the biggest. It is true that we cannot let our country be attacked. And we should not diminish our freedoms merely to feel safe. This is a difficult issue and we've been living with this consciousness for almost a decade. Our country's highest minds have been considering ramifications, contingencies, and all sorts of planning. We as a nation speak of peace and freedom, but the rest of the world only hears the sonic booms of our fighter jets and the explosions of our bombs.

What has Rick Perry done for Texas?

You know, when you think about lightning, you just think of the strike. I tend to forget that the lightning is always a path of potential. Each atom in the air has its electrons that are just moving in their paths with the potential moving through them. The strike doesn't happen until the potential is greater than the resistance, and then it's instantaneous. Each electron jumps to the next atom on the path and all that's left is the rolling thunder.

Rick Perry in 2006 won by plurality. He didn't have a majority of the voters behind him. Strayhorn, and Friedman and Bell had more votes put together. So who knows how many Republicans and Democrats went Independent, but probably enough of them will stay on base for this election.

I think voting should be like praying. Done in private. Those that announce their vote and dance around have already received their reward, though it's beyond me what reward they get. Personally I'm a Libratarian, I feel that before you say something, you should go to the library and get a good book. But I have been hearing some sense lately from the candidates. Perry put out a statement to the effect of, "I've never been pro-secession." John Cornyn chided in with, "There are more important problems." Mocking aside those are both good things to hear. All I've heard the Democrats do is call the Governor hirsute.

Constitutionally, Texas can divide into five parts. I don't know who gets to vote to make this happen, but think of the power the Trans-Texas region would have with 10 senators. Actually I don't think the five states that were formerly Texas would get along. Some rivalry would come up. On a certain level I think people that vote just don't think. That's what a parties are for, aren't they. Parties decide the platform and the people say, "Ok you're the leader." Well I must admit that this lack of thinking has gone to the top. I mean really, the weather has become a point of contention. We know Texas weather, it's unpredictable. And we're using it to divide the country. We don't elect weathermen, so why should we let politicos weigh in on precipitation? Several centuries ago there was a little ice age. In London the Thames froze and they had frost fairs on it. That's like us playing ice hockey on Lake Whitney. Weather happens, there's no use getting upset about it or especially voting on it.

Rick Perry did pardon a man who had received a life sentence in prison for smoking marijuana. I'm not pro pot, I think that it should be illegal and people should have to attend a rehabilitation program if they smoke, but a life sentence? Even if it's breaking one's probation that's a bit excessive. So kudos to our Governor. Though instead of voting for him on Tuesday, I think I'll go pray in private and read a good book.